By Nick Ongeso
Women need a reason to have sex, but men just need a place. In the 21st century, sexual motives go beyond love, pleasure, and making babies. Among the younger generation,” What is the main purpose of engaging in sexual intimacy?’’
A married couple may come with a lot of reasons to say ”Not today, honey, I am tired” but how many reasons can a couple name for wanting to have sex? How about five, six, or ten reasons?
It all narrows down to the younger generations, and most of them are in the university, colleges, and tertiary institutions, and now in our high schools, and most of them have given 1000 reasons for having sex.
From pleasure to procreation, today’s reason for taking a roll in the hay seems to vary as much as the terms for the deed itself.
Today’s young people are the main character in the scenes of sexual intercourse. From being the young and innocent to being the guilty and sinful.
A sexual motivation review studies that teenagers approach motivations such as experiencing pleasure, feeling valued, expressing affection, receiving comfort as the most rewards of sexual behaviour.
Teenagers are offering far more reasons for choosing to engage in the sexual act, and today the sexual behaviours seem to have taken different social, cultural, and psychological forms.
Some of the sexologists say there is only one reason to be engaging in the sexual act, and it is because sex is a basic need. Can sex be a basic need? We only know of food, shelter, and clothing and now have sex in the list. That would simply mean that without sex we can die. Despite all of us being its product, it’s a crisis when we see our younger brothers and sisters and even children engage in the act.
I have interacted with so many teenagers who are university students, and their reasons are quite surprising. One of them told me that they fornicate because of physical, goal-based, emotional, and insecurity reasons.
They told me they engage in it for physical reasons for pleasure, stress relief, and even exercise. Others said it was a goal-based technique to seek revenge either on their partners or friends. Do people engage in sex to seek revenge? That was their reason.
According to the majority, emotions are the main reason since they engage in the act because of love and gratitude.
As a teenager, can you engage in the sinful act to boost your esteem or to prevent your partner from seeking sex from another person? Yes, this generation is doing justice to it because they are very insecure with the people they are in a relationship with or believe to be with.
To be honest, men seek sex because they like how it feels, but women are interested in the relationship enhancement that it offers. A woman would agree to engage in the act because of the benefits that it brings along like safety, stability, and love.
Young men and women typically have yet to be in serious relationships and are beginning to discover their sexuality.
More focus should be put on what to do to avoid, but it’s so shameful to see our future leaders sink and sink into the ocean of sex.
Sexuality is a topic that should be normalized at home by parents, relatives, and even the role models in our society.
Imagine the reaction when someone starts talking about sex in a group, of course, people will shy off and even keep themselves busy doing nothing on their phones or biting their nails. Why is a natural part of human biology perceived shamefully? And why do people assume that once sex education is brought to the table, the conversation will become inappropriate?
There is a big problem surrounding us if we cannot talk about sex education. Whether it is in schools or at home, many people tend to avoid talking about it. However, what so many fail to realize is that not acknowledging the big elephant in the room will cause more harm than good.
And the harm is already done. But, can we save the remaining part of the generation?
This younger generation needs to be informed and talked to at all costs because very soon they are going to be parents, and what will they tell their children concerning sex if they have never talked about it?
When kids grow up in an environment that does not educate them about an inevitable part of life and human nature, then these kids will be misinformed and even oblivious. And misinformed kids become adults who do not know their sexual rights or how to stay safe.
Normalizing sex education and its conversation is an important step in fulfilling and removing the shame and awkwardness it carries.
One of the teens told me they would rather Google about sex on the internet than talk with their parents or someone, and it kept me wondering how sex has been normalized in our teens, yet they cannot even speak about it.
For us to eliminate or at least try to save the remaining part of our future generations from falling prey to this beast called fornication, then we need to do something about it, we need to work towards integrating it into school curriculums without feeling embarrassed or blushing every time the word “sex” comes up.
Instead of parents telling their children to use family planning or condoms. Why don’t they tell them to abstain at all costs and wait for the right time?
We will have done a greater thing and saved our younger generation, and, as we all know, humans will find an excuse to defend their failures.
If we don’t speak about it and wait for the milk to spill, then they will get early pregnancy or get sexually transmitted diseases or even HIV. And who will they blame for not advising, educating, or protecting them?